Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Christian One Liners

Don't let your worries get the best of you; remember, Moses started out as a basket case.

Some people are kind, polite, and sweet-spirited; until you try to sit in their pews.

Many folks want to serve God, but only as advisers.

It is easier to preach ten sermons, than it is to live one.

The good Lord didn't create anything without a purpose, but mosquitoes come close.

When you get to your wit's end, you'll find God lives there.

People are funny; they want the front of the bus, the middle of the road, and the back of the church.

Opportunity may knock once, but temptation bangs on the front door forever.

Quit griping about your church; if it was perfect, you couldn't belong.

If a church wants a better pastor, it only needs to pray for the one it has.

We're called to be witnesses, not lawyers or judges.

God Himself doesn't propose to judge a man until he is dead. So why should you?

Some minds are like concrete, thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.

I don't know why some people change churches; what difference does it make which one you stay home from?

A lot of church members singing 'Standing on the Promises' are just sitting on the premises.

Be ye fishers of men. You catch 'em - He'll clean 'em.

Stop, Drop, and Roll won't work in Hell.

Don't put a question mark where God put a period.

Don't wait for 6 strong men to take you to church.

Forbidden fruits create many jams.

God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called.

God grades on the cross, not the curve.

God loves everyone, But probably prefers 'fruits of the spirit' over 'religious nuts!'

He who angers you, controls you!

If God is your Co-pilot, swap seats!

Prayer: Don't give God instructions, just report for duty!

6 comments:

luvmy4sons said...

I firmly believe some parts of creation are part of the fall...and I would put mosquitoes in that category! LOL! Some good laughs you posted here. Blessings to you.

annie's eyes said...

These are great for a smile this day. Thanks for sharing. Love, AnnetteG

Karen said...

Too funny (with an ouch or two thrown in as we recognize ourselves.)

enjoy the day, girl!

love,
karen

Nancy said...

Great fun. Thanks for posting these memorable one liners.

Cheryl Barker said...

These are great, Annette :) Especially like the one about Moses starting out as a basket case :)

freefun0616 said...

酒店經紀人,
菲梵酒店經紀,
酒店經紀,
禮服酒店上班,
酒店小姐兼職,
便服酒店經紀,
酒店打工經紀,
制服酒店工作,
專業酒店經紀,
合法酒店經紀,
酒店暑假打工,
酒店寒假打工,
酒店經紀人,
菲梵酒店經紀,
酒店經紀,
禮服酒店上班,
酒店經紀人,
菲梵酒店經紀,
酒店經紀,
禮服酒店上班,
酒店小姐兼職,
便服酒店工作,
酒店打工經紀,
制服酒店經紀,
專業酒店經紀,
合法酒店經紀,
酒店暑假打工,
酒店寒假打工,
酒店經紀人,
菲梵酒店經紀,
酒店經紀,
禮服酒店上班,
酒店小姐兼職,
便服酒店工作,
酒店打工經紀,
制服酒店經紀,
酒店經紀,

,酒店,